A Christmas Verse Collection

Earworm 
When the snowman brings the snow, 
well he just might like to know 
that all I want for Christmas is 
a very shiny nose and if you ever saw it you might even say you 
gave it away the very next day. 
And sleigh bells ring are you listening, in the lane 
snow is falling all me around children playing having fun, 
while I'm dreaming of a 
mummy kissing Santa Claus underneath t
he chestnuts roasting on an open fire. 
So have yourself a merry little 
Donkey

Sticky Tape

The shop is out of sticky tape 

I don’t know what to do,

it’s  coming up to Christmas Day

and you can’t wrap presents with glue. 

I’ve yards and yards of paper

tags and ribbons too

but the shop is out of sticky tape

and you can’t wrap presents with glue. 

I can’t use stickers or blue tack 

staples just won’t do 

it’s  coming up to Christmas Day

and you can’t wrap presents with glue. 

Your fingers get all sticky 

The paper gets soggy too

the wrapping sticks to the presents. 
No, you can’t wrap  presents with glue.

This one comes from the fact I am an Uncle as well as a writer and the boys are all under ten. 

Tis the season 

Tis the season to  be smelly fa la la la la la la la la

Lots of food gone in my belly fa la la la la la la la la

I ate turkey, I ate sprouts fa la la fa la la la la la 

Now's the time to let it out fa la la la la la la la la 

Christmas Poem 

Lying dead 

in the frozen goods aisle

in Marks & Spencer's. 

Trademark red 

suit and black boots 

white beard. 

He'd only popped in 

for a bag of carrots.  

Parents shield children's 

eyes 

as paramedics attend 

in vain.

Reindeer wait patiently outside.

T’was the night before Christmas 

T’was the night before Christmas 

and all through the land

fights were erupting 

getting out of hand. 

Fights in the streets 

arms like windmills, 

fights in the living rooms 

over credit card bills. 

dramatic bust-ups then 

tears in the loos 

Mothers chide fathers 

for getting on the booze.

But on Christmas morning 

it’s all in the past 

it reminds to be seen

if the ceasefire will last.

Christmas Cards

Receive, open,

Stand, gather dust,

take down, 

Throw away.