Dressed to Kill

Amy had just finished blow drying her hair and was now deciding what to wear. She’d already decided on the burgundy dress, it was her favourite and she loved the way he showed off her petite body. Now she had to decide if to go barelegged or not, the heat of the last few days had given way to changeable weather; it might be a bit chilly at night. So stockings or tights? Hmm a big decision. Were stockings a bit too forward? Was it only her head or did stockings have a certain connotation with men? If he caught a glimpse of stocking tops, would he take her for granted, think she was easy? But then tights were a bit of a passion killer if it ever got that far and if it was hot she’d regret the tights. What the hell? Stockings, it would be cooler and nicer for her, and she’d feel sexy. Now she had to decide heels or flats, her heart said heels, her head said flats. She plumped for her little, black, heeled boots - they were just sexy enough. She looked at herself in the mirror; she looked good. Had she gone a little over the top? Maybe for a first date - but she didn’t care, she smiled to herself, poor Ted wouldn’t know what hit him.

The doorbell rang, she looked at her watch - he was bang on time. She left her flat and went down to meet him wondering where he was going to take her. She couldn’t believe her eyes when she saw him. If she was metaphorically dressed to kill, then he was literally dressed to kill. He was unshaven and possibly unshowered. He was wearing a grotty, green army t-shirt and combat, camouflage shorts with army boots on his feet. In his hand he had a lead which had a large black dog attached to it. She was surprised he didn’t have a gun slung over his shoulder.

‘You ready’ he said not even noticing how good she looked, ‘I thought we could take the dog for a walk.’

They’d been flirting with each other for weeks in work and finally he’d crossed the line and asked her out. She’d been so excited, she really liked Ted; he was such a sweetie.  She’d envisaged a nice restaurant or at least a bar somewhere some drinks etc and then maybe back to his, or maybe not. Maybe leave that till the second date to keep him keen. What she wasn’t expecting was a bloody dog walk. Okay she’d shown a load of interest when he’d talked about his mutt in work but that was part of hooking him in.

She wondered what they looked like to other people as they walked across the road towards the park. Her looking like she is going to whore, him looking like he was going to war. She’d thought the dress, the stockings and the heels would make her feel sexy but in reality she felt a bit of a fool tottering around, chasing after the hound, especially as Ted still hadn’t even commented on how great she looked.

All of that hope, all of that anticipation, all misplaced.

And now the dog had done its business, the hands that she’d imagined touching her were handling warm dog poo. She’d known he had a dog, so deep down she must have known he’d pick up its mess but to see it first hand was a bit of a passion killer especially as it was before those hands had even touched her. She decided it was time to cut her losses and go home…alone.